Friday, May 9, 2014

Dear Mother


They say the better you are as a Mother, the less needed you will be in the long run.  I somewhat believe in this theory.  If you have instilled the values you hope to see in your child, you will always be around even if you are not physically there.  What still stands out to me about my Mother is a sense of belief she had in who I was to become.  She always told me that there is nothing I cannot be.  “Ndixolele uba nepeynti enye ndimane ndiyihlamba ebusuku” (Even if it means I own just one pair of panties & wash them every night) was one of her famous hilarious linesJ.   She believed in me to a point that sometimes I’d think…is this woman for real…  I remember when I matriculated, I came home and I told her that I wanted to go study in Cape Town.  The woman had barely half of the fees required at University level but she said “You are going.” and I went. 

My Mom is a very quiet and reserved woman, but she is the funniest person ever!  Her humor is not your usual “Stand up Comedy” or “I am funny” type.  She will crack you up in the most strangest of ways, and leave you laughing all by yourself.  Today I would like to celebrate this incredible woman!  The woman who raised and nurtured me to the best of her abilities.  Growing up as a child it was just a ‘nice thing’ to have a Mother.  Being a Mother myself, now I understand what it takes to be a parent.  To have someone that you are responsible for.  A life that looks up to you for guidance and direction. 

The beauty about being an African child, I am blessed with more than one Mother.  Almost all the incredible women in my family played a role of a Mother to me.  The entire village where I grew up contributed in one way or another in shaping the kind of woman I am today.   I salute these women!  This Mother’s Day, may the good Lord bless you with a world of abundant wisdom.  May you live longer to continue to be a blessing to others. 

To my friends who are Mothers – We soldier on MommiesJ!  Sometimes it’s not easy, but it’s the most fulfilling gift ever.  One of my greatest moments as a Mother is when I come back home in the afternoon.  My children are always happy to see me.  They’ll run to the car like little puppies, with so much joy in their eyes shouting “Mama”.   It doesn’t matter how I stumbled throughout my day trying to figure out life, there are two little people who thinks I’m just great.

To all children, remember that having a Mother is a blessing not all of us have.  Some children lost their Mothers early in their lives.  Some have never met their Mothers.  Some are looking and still go to bed longing to be reunited with their Mothers.  Appreciate and embrace your Moms for who they are.  One of the things I learnt very early in life is that – you cannot choose family.  What is wonderful though is that you can choose and shape your own family to be what you wish you had.  Remember if you sit and cry over what you never had, you not only creating a ‘sorry’ life for yourself.  You are contributing to a recurring failing system in your family.  Make a detour and be the change you want to see.  If you had a Motherless childhood, make sure that you are the best version of a Mother to your own children.  Be a woman of change!  Break the cycle!  It can start with you!


Until next time – Happy Mother’s Day to all Mothers

Tamara Booi